tiny steps...

it's happening, slowly but surely maya is taking small steps here and there.  i wanted to report that, since it's been a long time since i've written.  as always i have to remember that maya takes her time at figuring things out...but she does figure them out eventually.  this is a lesson in patience and letting go for me.  i see that she is getting more adventurous, she stands and looks out the window now, she stands and takes 4 steps to her high chair, she likes walking people to the door when they leave.

we try and cheer her on every time she stands up and take a few steps.  now she claps for herself also.  she is learning how to balance.  and in recent developments we have found out that she has fluid in her right ear.  with a couple of ear infections under her belt we have decided to get ear tubes put in.  we are hoping that this will help with her speech and her walking.  it's coming soon, june 1st and i'm so dreading it.  but i've heard from all my friends that it is a good thing. 

i have to say that in the last couple of weeks she has surprised me by standing up in places i did not think she would.  for example, in story time at the library, when the bubbles started, she stood up and walked over where the other kids were.  it was so great to see that she did it on her own, without my prompting. i was a proud mama at that moment...and then i had to jump in because she started using some kids head as support.  =)

i like to eat, eat, crunchies and oranges...

i certainly don't want to forget how far we have come.  yesterday i decided to take a couple of quick photos of maya's snacks....the crunchies i call them.  she loves to eat salty stuff, a gurl after my own heart. i remember there was a time when i never thought she would eat anything crunchy, anything that wasn't baby food.  oh how wonderful it is to pack up some of her favorite snacks and be able to share them with her friends.  i don't worry so much anymore if she can eat their stuff...just most of the time she doesn't like it because a lot of kiddos love sweet stuff. 

at this point maya doesn't like fruit very much, but she does like mandarin oranges.  i tried fresh ones, but she likes the (sweetened) canned ones.  i have been tricking her into eating apples by boiling them a little and mixing them in with her oranges.  if they are small enough she doesn't notice the difference.  i'm not sure if it's the texture or taste of "real/fresh" fruit but she just prefers the canned stuff.

and finally, while we were out to dinner she actually drank some water.  for some reason she just doesn't like water or watered down juice.  she's a milk girl.  she drank about one fourth of her water and that was a miracle!  it could have been the straw or the clear cup, either way, i brought it home to try it here.  it's those little tricks we all try i guess, part of being a mom.  =) 

wordless wednesday

tomorrow...

today after storytime in the library play area maya bit a little girl on the arm.  i was so sad, frustrated, angry, and embarrassed.  poor little girl had all of maya's teeth marks on her arm...oh it was so sad.  i really felt like crying when i apologized to the mom and the little girl.  i tried to tell maya to say sorry and told her that she hurt the little girl. maya didn't seem to understand at all what she had done. the mother was so nice about it, but i could see many of the other mom's staring at us.  i felt horrible.  what did they think of us?  were they judging us, because it sure did seem so.  i apologized profusely for my daughters actions, but none of that will take away the impression she made on everyone there. 

i immediately went to that place of worry, is my daughter doing this because she has down syndrome?   how will she be able to interact with others if she is biting and pulling everyone's hair? no one will want to be her friend or mine.

in the car i started to feel very lonely.  yes, she is just a toddler, but she has down syndrome also.  and this effects me in many ways.  it feels like a lonely road these days, there doesn't seem to be anyone i can talk to about this.  she is not walking yet, not talking, and when i see other mom's with their kids in our mom's group, i see how their children run and play.  they climb the stairs and slide down the big slides, they play in the sand together.  it all seems so normal and wonderful.  i am trying to give maya every opportunity to be there, but sometimes, days like today, i am tired of always having to watch her, always worrying that she will hurt herself or throw something and hit someone accidentally. i know this is just a phase, it's not like she does it all the time. they say every child goes through these things, but today i feel powerless.  and it bugs the hell out of me! 

so there it is, maybe just a little venting will do me some good. tomorrow will be another day, a better day i hope.

Sunday, it happened!

we had some friends over last sunday. they have a sweet little pea, who also happens to have Down Syndrome. it was so great to hang out with them. we spent a lot of time just chatting, eating and enjoying the little ones. it was then, sometime in the late a.m. when Maya decided that she was gonna stand up all on her own. it was so amazing and even more so to share it with our friends. all that day we encouraged her to stand by clapping and cheering her on. Maya also loves to clap for herself so she was totally into it.

the next day, I kept telling her to stand, and she did, over and over again. oh what a beautiful sight it is! over the next few days, she was very enthusiastic about standing. then on wednesday morning, while we were having OT, Maya stood up and took two tiny steps. oh they were so very tiny, but they were steps. she is getting a little bit more adventurous, taking tiny steps here and there everyday now. they are oh so small, but they are treasured dearly.

since then, i have noticed that Maya is definitely gaining more confidence. she is standing up more my furniture or the wall and even the stove. now she is interested in exploring spaces. it feels so good to see this happen. it's almost here, i can really see it. she's gonna take off any minute and then i'm sure i'll be chasing after her (with a big grin on my face).